What Blondes want
by Tropicwhale
Summary: Slashy oneshot Harry and Draco share a moment alone when Lucius walks in.


What Blondes want

Summery: Bit of random slash, really! Draco and Harry have a moment alone when Lucius walks in. HUMOR I swear!

Disclaimer: Mmm, nothing, I own nothing, lest of all the great Harry Potter frandcise.

What blondes want.

"Harry?" Draco push the sleeping Gryffindor a little. "Harry, wake up it's almost dawn."

"Eh?" Harry grabbed his glasses. "what?"

"Morning, sleepy."

"Draco?"

"Good to see you haven't lost your memory while asleep, dear one." Draco pushed his bangs back. "And as much as I want you to stay for breakfast but..."

"If Lucius walks in-" The door opened and Lucius walked in.

"He'll catch you?" the elder Malfoy sneered.

"Uh, yeah, that."

"Draco, I always knew you were a disgrace."

"Father, honestly-"

"Silence, Draco, if I want you to speak you will. Until then, be quiet."

"yes, father" Draco bowed his head.

"I can't believe you. I WANTED HIM." Lucius pouted and stamped his foot. The boys looked at each other.

"Uh-?" Draco was eloquent.

"What?" So was Harry.

"I wanted you and my idiot son stole you from me!"

"Stole?" Draco looked thunderstruck "He was mine, is mine, and will be MINE until we decide we don't want to be together anymore! AND your married. To my MOTHER. He's young enough to be your son! He's dating your son! Shove off!"

"So." Lucius pouted even harder. "I want him"

"You do realize you sound like a petulant child?" Draco glared at his father. Lucius flipped his hair and stamped his foot.

"But, he's pretty!" Harry cocked his head to the left.

"Am I not here?" Draco patted his hair patronizingly

"shhh, baby, the Malfoys are talking." Harry's jaw dropped.

"Why you little FERRET!" The gryffindor tackled the blonde and tickled him.

"Ah! baby! Sweetheart! YOH POTHEAD! Cut it out!" Draco giggled

"Pothead?"

"what?"

"Anti-potter fan."

"Uh, I just buggered you last night, I am a fan of your ass."

"What are you talking about? I buggered you!"

"Only because I pitied you!"

"Oh really?"

"Yeah!"

"Pity" Harry shrugged and began to get dressed.

"What are you doing!" Draco shouted

"No Clothes!" Lucius whined. "Clothes on Harry evil." Harry sent them both a glare that would have cowed a nesting female Hungarian Horntail Dragon. The reaction of the Malfoys involved much cowering and pleeding for their lives and for mercy.

"If you two both see me more as a sex toy then a person, buh-bye" Harry grabbed his Firebolt and prepared to fly out the window when Lucius tackled him and started licking his face.

"Pretty, yummy Harry. No go buh-byies. Please" puppy eyes (AN: hey have you ever seen a Malfoy with puppy eyes? ya just have to say "awwww").

"But!"Then Draco tackled him.

"Mine!" The younger Malfoy grabbed a arm.

"nuh-uh, Mine" Lucius grabbed the other arm. They glared at each other.

"Mine"

"Mine"

"Mine"

"Mine"

"Mine"

"Mine"

"Mine"

"Mine" During the _very_ childish arguement, Harry was pulled back and forth between the two blondes.

"But!" Harry looked hopelessly at them and started to wish he had gone with Snape when the Potions Master confessed his undying love for him (AN: eck)

"Mine"

"Mine"

"Mine"

"Mine"

"Mine"

"Mine"

"Mine"

"Mine"

"I be both of yours if you stop playing tug-o-Harry!" He said depressed (AN you try being the rope in tug-of-war between two blondes, it ain't easy!)The Malfoys stopped, thankfully and stared at the Seeker-Savior boy

"KAY!" and proceed to bugger him senseless for two days straight.

"Gawd. That's what would have happen if I choose Draco over you?" Harry straightened the covers on his bed. Severus smirked

"Yes, happened to me, and your younger and prettier."

"Thanks by the way for keeping me company while I'm sick." Severus kissed his Gryffindor's forehead.

"I wouldn't have had to if you just drunk the Pepper-Up Potion when I told you to."

"Yeaaah, but then I won't not have got to listen your your voice say 'bugger' three times and made fun of Malfoys at the same time."

"You are a _very_ easy man to please."

"Yeah, I chose you over Draco didn't I?"

"Why you little-, your lucky your sick."

"True, sexy story voice aside. Wanna know a secret?" Snape rolled his eyes

"sure"

"I did take Pepper-Up." They looked at each other for .002 seconds and then Severus tore after Harry through the house.

END

no flames please, meant in fun!


End file.
